Miraloma Park Improvement Club

Miraloma Life: September 2005

Meet Your Neighbors – MPIC Fall Clubhouse Event
Picturing Miraloma Life
Questions for Your Pharmacist
[From Above] – Aerial Photo Exhibit Wows Visitors
What is NERT Anyway?
Sunnyside Park Happenings
Who Killed Cock Robin
Volunteering at Miraloma Elementary School – A Most Rewarding Activity
Graffiti
Legal Ease
Design Matters
A Lotta Otters – A News Poem
A Sad Dog Story
You Were Expecting Maybe a Coyote?
Important Telephone Numbers

Meet Your Neighbors – MPIC Fall Clubhouse Event

by Jim O’Donnell

Autumn is upon us, and your Miraloma Park Improvement Club (MPIC) wants to meet you! Following our successful garage sale last Spring (organized by board member and local real estate agent Sue Kirkham), we are having a welcome to the neighborhood event for new and old residents at the MPIC Clubhouse. If you are not familiar with it, you see the Clubhouse every time you drive along O’Shaughnessy. It is the quaint green building at Del Vale with the large parking lot. The MPIC offers the clubhouse for rental, and many of you have had important events here in the past. Hundreds of local residents are members of MPIC. Of course, you are all invited to come to our soon-to-be-a-tradition of a Fall neighborhood “meet and greet” event. Put the time and date on your calendar: Sunday October 16 from 3 to 5 PM. Hors d’oeuvres and drinks will be provided by MPIC.

Why attend? Firstly, many of you have participated in the Remodel, Kitchen and Garden tours in recent years, and this event is just another way to provide value to the neighborhood. Secondly, you will get a chance to talk and share your concerns with city officials, such as Ingleside District Police Captain Paul Chignell and Supervisor Sean Elsbernd, who have a direct effect on our neighborhood. We will also have representation from the Fire Department.. Thirdly, we will also have some updates on recent recommendations for traffic safety improvements to the neighborhood, like well-traveled Teresita Boulevard. Lastly, this is a casual event where you can enjoy some wine and cheese, talk with neighbors, and be part of an active neighborhood association dedicated to maintaining the high quality of life here on the slopes of Mt. Davidson.

So join us Sunday, October 16, 3-5PM in the afternoon at the Clubhouse. And since the 49ers have the day off, we are the best event in town. See you there!

Picturing Miraloma Life

by Jacquie Proctor

Do you have pictures you would like to share of your Miraloma Park history? Here is one from long time resident, Bertha Jones, of her daughter, Nancy, and classmates all dressed up for the first day of first grade at the old Miraloma School in 1951. Note the popularity of the Hop Along Cassidy lunchpail. Joel Raymond and Barbara Rogers are in the group. Recognize anyone else? Did you know that the first Miraloma School was on what is now the playground area and consisted of portable bungalows installed in 1936? Referred to as “the shacks” by parents, they were heated with coal in pot belly stoves. After Dale Jones and other parents submitted a census of children in the neighborhood, construction began on the permanent school in 1951.

Email your pictures and captions for publication to webmaster@miralomapark.org. . If you need me to make a copy of the picture for you, leave a message for me at the club house phone number (281-0892) and I will get in touch with you.

Questions for Your Pharmacist

by Joanne Whitney

1. Are there other names for this drug? Is it generic? Is it a brand name drug?
2. What is it used for? Drugs have many uses. You should know why you are taking it.
3. If the instructions are complicated, ask the pharmacist to explain them. Be sure you are absolutely certain about the instructions before you leave the pharmacy.
4. Ask when and how you should take the drug. With or without food? If once a day, in the morning, evening or at bedtime? If several times a day, how many hours between doses?
5. Any special instructions? You may have to shake a suspension. Do you store the drug at room temperature or in the refrigerator? Do you keep the drug away from light? Do you store it in a dry place? Some medicines should never be taken with alcohol.
6. What are side effects of the drug? Which ones are serious? Your pharmacist can tell you what to look for and what to do if you do have a reaction.
7.Are there any interactions with other drugs you are taking? Your pharmacist should have a list of all your drugs and can tell you if there are any problems.
8. Also ask about any over the counter and herbal preparations you are taking? Many can interact with prescription drugs.
9. What if you miss a dose? Generally omit that dose and take the drug at the next scheduled time.
10. Ask for the package insert but don’t let it scare you into not taking the medicine.

[From Above] – Aerial Photo Exhibit Wows Visitors

by Phil Laird

You have probably seen the “Above” books (Above San Francisco, Above Paris, etc.) in bookstores and on coffee tables. Robert Cameron is the artist who took all these pictures and created the books. A retrospective of his work is showing through October 2 at the Presidio Officer’s Club, 50 Moraga Avenue, with over 50 large format prints from around the world.

At age 94, Cameron is still an active photographer, although diminishing eyesight is starting to limit his work. Introduced to photography by his father, he worked as a news photographer and served the military as a civilian photographer during World War II. In the sixties he moved to San Francisco (where he still lives) and published his first book of aerial photographs, Above San Francisco, in 1969. Fifteen more books followed, with the most recent, Above Mexico City, published in April of last year.

In addition to spectacular photographs, the exhibit offers insight into Cameron’s background, techniques, and philosophy. He shoots from a helicopter with a Pentax 6X7 camera, six lenses, and an image stabilizer. Some of his equipment is on display.
The exhibit is open Wednesday through Sunday from 11 AM to 5 PM. Cameron comes by periodically to discuss his work; check with the docent to find out when. For information, visit www.presidio.gov/Visiting/Events/Above.htm or phone (415)561-5500.

What is NERT Anyway?

The Neighborhood Emergency Response Team (NERT) program was begun by the San Francisco Fire Department in the wake of the 1989 Loma Prieta earthquake. At the huge fire in the Marina volunteers assisted San Francisco firefighters in such labor intensive tasks as leading hose lines by hand to supply water from the Bay to the fire site. In a larger scale disaster, it is believed, the use of civilian volunteers will be even more necessary.

Indeed, when the feared and statistically expected “Big One” hits, official speculation anticipates that the citizens of San Francisco will have to be totally self-reliant for the first 72 hours after the quake. This means the Fire Department, Police Department & ambulance services will be so overwhelmed as to be completely unavailable. Electricity, gas, and phone lines will be down. Cell phones will likely be inoperable as well.

The San Francisco Fire Department developed the NERT training program as a response to this situation to give volunteers a higher level of basic skills in fire fighting, search & rescue, disaster medicine, and basic disaster preparedness.

The training is designed to work in three specific ways. NERT training graduates are:

1) Better prepared in self-sufficiency following a disaster.

2) Better able to provide emergency assistance to their family and immediate neighbors.

3) Better able to work as a team member in their neighborhood or as an adjunct to city services in the event of a major disaster.

We in Miraloma Park have an active NERT team. We have drills, meetings and lots of fun regularly. Our team also has the distinction of having a particularly active emergency HAM communications contingent. All are invited to take the Fire Department’s valuable 6 part training for yourself and your family, at the very least. And all are invited to be a part of our neighborhood team, to further the overriding NERT goal and mantra, “To Do The Most Good For The Most People.”

Gary Isaacson garyi6n@aol.com, Phil Laird pdlaird@pacbell.net (Miraloma Park NERT Team co-coordinators)

Sunnyside Park Happenings

by Andrea O’Leary

The money is in the bank! Long awaited capital funds for Sunnyside Park renovations have finally been allotted. The $3.7 million will not cover all areas of the park, such as rebuilding the recreation center building, but will cover play structures, bathrooms at the field, tennis and basketball court resurfacing and required ADA compliance. Most City public property design work is actually performed by Department of Public Works under the supervision of Recreation and Park Department Planning Division. At lease four other park projects are further along in planning ahead of Sunnyside. Park advocates are pressing to have final designs brought back for one last review by residents by the end of 2005 with ground breaking by Summer 2006. However, any firm schedule at this time is only anticipation.

In the meantime, Sunnyside Park Families & Neighbors (SPFN), with support from the Sunnyside Neighborhood Association (SNA), continue their Sunnyside Park Kid’s Play Equipment Fundraiser with a goal to earn enough to purchase a special piece of equipment for the playground thereby stretching renovation dollars to cover more of the park. All Kids Playground Equipment Fund donations are greatly appreciated, tax deductible and can be made in two ways: c/o San Francisco Parks Trust, 501 Stanyan St., SF 94117 or c/o SNA, P.O. Box 27615, SF 94127. For more information call 334-3601.

Tai Chi is back.
As it has been for over five years, another grant has been acquired to continue free Tai Chi classes every Saturday at 9:00 AM on Sunnyside Park’s tennis court. This grant also funds classes on West Portal Playground’s tennis court on Fridays at 11:00 AM. Similar classes are also available at Brooks Park on Saturdays at 10:30 AM. Teacher Oliver Chu emphasizes the fundamentals of Tai Chi that build relaxed minds and bodies, improve balance, increase energy and reduce stress. This healthful form of exercise is beneficial to persons of all ages and of all physical and fitness levels.

The neighborhood benefits when quality programs such as Tai Chi are made available within the community and promotes stewardship of our public parks. Tax deductible donations can also be made to: “Tai Chi In Parks”, c/o San Francisco Parks Trust, 501 Stanyan St., SF 94117. For more information call 334-3601.

Who Killed Cock Robin

The morning sang to itself,
soothed to robin’s egg blue
a sky that had started gray.
Flowers opened their mouths
and uttered musical musk
while two butterflies twirled
in a blossoming lilac bush.

A robin strutted, note upon a line,
his breast puffed as he called
all the surrounding air his own.
Fourteen years apiece had not taught
my friend and me a way to honor this.
He dared, I aimed and pulled and
shot the robin with our pellet gun.

Fallen, he arched and threshed the grass
as if to fly through earth, not air.
I said I don’t believe it, tasting bile.
What a shot! my friend replied.
We’d better put him out of misery.
He set the barrel to the bird’s head
and shot Cock Robin dead.

The world in the yard skewed and I
emptied like a sieve, knowing at last,
clear as the glass-blue, birdless sky
that I and everyone I loved would die.
Nothing else changed. One birdsong
gone, that was all. Still in their bush,
the twin yellow butterflies twirled.

Volunteering at Miraloma Elementary School – A Most Rewarding Activity

by Dan Liberthson

For the past 2 years, I have been a volunteer at the Miraloma Elementary School at Myra and Omar, down the block from my house, tutoring third-graders in need of help with reading and math twice weekly for an hour and a half a session. I have had a blast working with these 8- to 9-year old kids, getting to know them and watching them gain ground as the school year progresses. Some may be behind in reading and other schoolwork because of attention deficit disorder (ATD), difficulty focusing due to hyperactivity, or other conditions. Others read and comprehend very well but need practice reading aloud because English is their second language. Yet others may come from home environments in which reading and learning are not encouraged, or in which other problems interfere with their ability to concentrate and face the challenges of education. But I have found that given patience, encouragement, and a humorous and playful approach, all of them have learned and grown both in terms of their reading and schoolwork and their ability to enjoy a rewarding relationship with me, which (with the occasional inevitable exception given the innate unpredictability of most kids) is usually delightful.

Miraloma Elementary School is a wonderful place in it’s own right. Just walking down the corridors and looking at all the exhibits of student projects covering the walls almost without break, I find myself grinning from ear to ear. Prints of butterflies and animals cover one space. Imaginative syllogisms fill another: “Ice is to cold as hot is to soup”; “Heart is to love as butterfly is to happy.” On the opposite side, brief identity poems artistically inscribed on long ribbons hang from the ceiling to make a forest of poetic tendrils to wander through: “I am an electric river” (shades of Walt Whitman there!); “I am a little sun mouse in a silver field” (sounds a bit like the English pastoral poet John Clare, but it’s by Sophie); “I am an electric metal dragon” (by Draco); and “I am a lightning wolf” (by Julian). Further on are reports about and drawings of animals; water colors and cracked wax “tesselations”; certificates of achievement for the students of the week; and a multimedia “Welcome to the Rocky Seashore” display, sculpted and assembled from paper plates, packing paper, saran wrap, and other bric-a-brac, all shaped and painted to mimic the seashore, complete with rocks, tidepools, and their many residents (crabs, starfish, anemones, medusas).

One notices too, walking through the corridors and looking into the classrooms, the extraordinary talent and dedication of the teachers, who manage to take an ethnically and behaviorally diverse assortment of kids at a wide range of learning levels and create a nurturing learning environment for them all. Because in the lower grades class sizes are small, the kids seem to get lots of individual attention, and teachers are able to relate to them one at a time, putting in the extra effort required for those less disciplined or less advanced, without leaving out those who are more advanced and/or well-behaved, who, of course, also need attention and stimulation. In the time I have spent at the school, I have never encountered a situation in which there was not, on the part of the teachers and other volunteers, an attitude of tolerance, support, respect, and encouragement, no matter what problems have arisen.

Given the diverse ethnic mix of the classes, including students of Hispanic, Middle Eastern, Asian, African American, and many other cultures, I have been particularly impressed by teachers’ constructive approach to familiarizing their students with one another’s cultures and traditions, explaining customs, holidays, and values so that the entire class can understand, accept, and enjoy them. When I was in elementary and high school in the 1950s and early 1960s, I remember no such attempt to create tolerance and harmony among different cultures and religions, and it is with gratitude and anticipation of a more harmonious future that I see this effort being made at Miraloma, and, I would expect, at other SF schools.

When I thought to volunteer at a school, I was interested in working in the classroom, particularly with individual students who could use additional help with their schoolwork. In order to do this, I signed up with a nonprofit organization called “San Francisco School Volunteers (SFSV),” located at 601 McAllister (phone: 749-3700; website, www.sfsv.org). They do the required background check and also a 3-hour introduction and orientation, and in addition they offer free 3-hour training sessions on relevant topics, like teaching remedial reading and teaching reading to children for whom English is a second language. After clearance from SFSV, volunteers can work at any San Francisco school of their choosing, and at any level (elementary, junior high, or high school). Adults interested in volunteering outside the classroom, for example in organizing or setting up for PTA meetings and other school activities, need not go through SFSV, but can contact the individual school of interest and ask to be put in touch with the PTA Director. At Miraloma Elementary, the PTA liaison is Katie Handelman, phone: 920-9593; email: poppy3@jps.net. She will be happy to hear from anyone who wants to help out with school activities.

Graffiti

by Sue Kirkham

Graffiti is blight on any neighborhood. If tolerated, it leads to crime and a decline in the quality of life. The safety of a neighborhood is compromised and there is a large decline in property values.

Gangs competing for turf do most of the graffiti. Any neighborhood would be well advised to send out a prompt and clear signal that they wil lnot be the turf of a gang. Gangs use graffiti to communicate and to establish their presence.

Rapid and persistent removal of graffiti discourages the perpetrators and causes them to seek new territories. Many years ago I formed the Graffiti Abatement Group in Miraloma Park. Volunteers are supplied with graffiti remover and/or water based paint. The volunteers are self-starters who endeavor to eliminate any graffiti they see as soon as possible. Some volunteers cover much of Miraloma Park.

Others take care of the bus stop or mailbox on their block, others the Cross on Mt. Davidson, and others the commercial areas, etc. The majority of volunteers have very demanding work, family, and volunteer demands, yet make time to preserve the quality of life here in Miraloma Park. Our efforts have paid off exceedingly well, but it is an ongoing job that needs many residents of Miraloma Park participating to keep the program successful.

The scope of our interest needs to go beyond the actual borders of Miraloma Park to the major thoroughfares that surround us. They bring the majority of traffic in and out of the neighborhood (Portola, O’Shaughnessy and Monterey). In my early years of graffiti abatement I noticed that if graffiti was left on these thoroughfares it soon started coming into the neighborhood.

I urge you to either become a Miraloma Park Graffiti Abatement volunteer by contacting me at 415-229-1297 for supplies and instructions, or by contacting the Department of Public Works (DPW) directly. These days we have some limited assistance from the City of San Francisco (DPW) Phone 241-WASH or e-mail 28clean@ci.sf.ca.us. You can call in or e-mail to report graffiti and I encourage you to do so. Follow up if it is not removed in a timely fashion. In addition you can telephone 28-CLEAN or e-mail 28clean@ci.sf.ca.us for trash removal.

The telephone numbers are published monthly, in the telephone directory on the back page of the Miraloma Life.

Remember to think about the thoroughfares in and out of Miraloma Park, and the commercial areas near us. Your family, friends, and people considering purchasing homes in Miraloma Park, arrive here via  those arteries and areas, and form opinions before they arrive. Use your property tax dollars and contact the departments noted above.

Let’s keep Miraloma Park a clean, beautiful, and safe place to live by volunteering, calling, and e-mailing.

Legal Ease

by Steven Solomon

It’s welcome back from summer time, again. School has started, & thoughts turn to . . .

Q: I’m thinking of having my kitchen remodeled. Any words of wisdom for dealing with contractors?

A: Yes, indeed. Be sure the contractor is licensed – call the Contractors’ License Board at (800) 321-2752. Make sure all work is included in a written contract. If you are not given time to review a contract before signing, don’t sign it. You can cancel a home improvement contract within 3 days — do in writing & keep a copy. And a contractor can only charge 10% of the total cost up front.

Speaking of 3-day cooling off periods, the Governor just signed the Car Buyer’s Bill of Rights. As of July, 2006, used car buyers will have 3 days to return a car & get their money back. California becomes the first state to enact this major consumer protection.

Steve Solomon is an 18 year resident of Miraloma Park. He just relocated his law office to West Portal where he continues to represent consumers and business groups in a variety of legal issues.

Design Matters

Peter A. Zepponi, AIA – Architect

This is a monthly column addressing basic residential design and home improvement topics of interest to Miraloma Park residents. If you have a question or topic you’d like considered for a future article please send an email to: pazdesignmatters@aol.com or call .334.2868.

Q: Hey! Got any extra 1938 original salmon pink bathroom wall tiles lying around? Preferably slightly faded.

A: Uh, no. But somebody might!

That’s how the conversation started last June. A seemingly simple question, but quite thought provoking. I’ve been thinking about this over the newsletter’s two month summer hiatus. Thinking about the way the original fabric and character of Miraloma Park, and many such pre and post war neighborhoods are slowly disappearing. While studying Historic Preservation, Adaptive Re-use and Contextualism in Italy, then returning to Cal Poly to finish my thesis on the same subject, the challenge was to decipher what was worth saving, and how to bring it back to life in order to function in today’s world. This concept is nothing new in Europe and throughout much of the world because most civilizations outside of the USA are actually old. Try telling a Roman about your ‘antique’ 1938 tile and they will laugh, but not here in the States. Just because our history is relatively new by world standards, it is still worth considering and respecting.
So, where do you find two or three, 1938 Miraloma Park slightly faded salmon pink wall tiles? I suppose you could start doing reconnaissance missions at the Sunday 1-4pm open houses, but there has got to be a better way. Shouldn’t there? Well, as it turns out, there are several organizations and businesses around the Bay Area that specialize in recycled and salvaged materials. I’ve included a list at the end of this column. But I thought I’d take it a step further and start our own neighborhood grass roots campaign right here! Any volunteers? In talking with the person who asked the original tile question, they suggested something on the internet. I know that some of the neighborhood children’s playgroups and other clubs/groups have an internet bulletin board. Perhaps someone would like to start one for Miraloma Park Materials? I’d do it, but you all know architects are much better in the ‘brick and mortar’ world than the ‘cyber space’ one. Perhaps something along the lines of a Craig’s List or a Personal Ad: Couple seeking 67 year old, slightly faded pink tile; wanted for baths and showers.

Maybe someone already has something like this going and I just don’t know about it. If so, send me an email. Otherwise, it could be very useful for homeowners, contractors, and architects to find these replacement materials. It might also be a good way for you to clean out your basement! I know I found construction materials, and yes, extra bathroom tiles in my basement. So before you throw it out, maybe you could post it on a bulletin board. Someone might just be looking for it. One example is the little lighted metal art deco house numbers that most of the Miraloma houses have.

And yes, they’re supposed to light up. Well, they are expensive to replace ($115) and getting hard to find. Recently while at Baurerware on 17 Street, I saw one for sale. They told me the company that made them was out of business, and that their inventory is running out.

So if you’re dying to replace your vintage house numbers with a nice new and improved plastic ‘modern’ one, don’t just throw the original one away! Offer it to one of the salvage shops, your neighbors or better yet, put it in your basement … in case you change your mind and want to put it back.

USEFUL RESOURCES:

Ohmega Salvage has a lot of great stuff. They are in Berkeley. Check out the “Links” on their website. MANY other resources are listed there.

www.ohmegasalvage.com
The Whole House Building Supply. It is an interesting organization. They send out mass emails for their “DEMOLITION SALES.” When a house ismgetting torn down, they have a demolition sale where you dismantle the stuff you want. They also have a large constantly changing inventory ofmsalvaged materials. www.driftwoodsalvage.com

Bauerware: They have tons of unique and vintage cabinet hardware and knobs. Visit the store at 17th and Noe. The website ((Site no longer available)) only has a small fraction of the in-store selection.

The contents of this column are for general information. Applicability to your specific project should be verified.

Peter A. Zepponi, AIA – Architects, is an architectural firm in San Francisco specializing in residential and commercial architecture.

A Lotta Otters – A News Poem

by Stan Andersen

Not so many as
Last year’s record high
Plying kelp beds
Along the coast diving
For sea urchins

But plenty of others
To delight everyone
Coming by to see
Masterful swimming
Belly or back.

Used to be hundreds
Of thousands, truly
A lotta otters
(Excuse the pun)
Till we banned the hunters;

Thank God we no longer
See furry strips and
Chunks of slaughtered
Otters cleverly sewn
Into fancy clothing

But at the right places
We still see
Lively otters swimming.

A Sad Dog Story

by Dan Liberthson

One fine day a few weeks ago I was walking my 13-year-old terrier mix on leash. Coming down the staircase from the Miraloma Elementary Playground, we were met by two dogs coming up, who though wearing leashes were running loose, unheld by whoever was walking them, who was at the bottom of the staircase not visible to me. One of the loose dogs seized my dog by the ear and caused wounds that required seven staples to close. It took the owner, who finally made it to the top of the stairs, about a half minute to persuade her dog to let go of mine. The vet’s bill came to nearly $300, which, thankfully, the owner paid.

The attacking dog was a powerful pitbull-ridgeback mix who, had she gotten a throat grip, could have killed my dog. It seemed at first to me that the young woman walking the dogs had probably responded to their pulling and tugging, their desire to be let loose on the fenced playground field where dogs are commonly run off-leash, by simply letting them go before they were securely inside the fence. She had probably never thought that there might be a person and a dog out of her sight, at the top of those stairs. But there was, and considerable pain and damage resulted.

Alternatively, she may have simply lost control of the dogs. I am grateful and lucky that it was not worse and that our dog recovered, and I am also grateful that it turned out to be a dog that was attacked, and not a child, who might just as well have been up that staircase.

The moral I draw from this story can best be explained by an analogy between driving a car and walking a dog. Everyone knows that the right way to drive is defensively—always aware of the limitations and potential failures of your own vehicle and the unpredictability of other drivers and vehicles. And everyone should know that the right way to walk a dog is also defensively—always aware that no matter how well you think you know your dog, he or she is not 100% predictable, nor can you predict what other people or dogs might do that could frighten or provoke a normally obedient dog. A dog who most of the time does not react to other dogs may for unknown reasons suddenly pick a fight with a particular dog. Also,

just as you would not trust a child or an inexperienced driver to handle a powerful car, you should never entrust a powerful dog to anyone not strong enough to restrain it or wise enough to know that it must be restrained. And when walking more than one dog, always be aware that the pack mentality can set in quickly. In fact, in most problem situations involving dogs that are off leash or out of control or supervision, the action develops too quickly to stop it before damage is done. This is why the City has a leash law requiring dogs to be leashed and restrained in public places except where dogs are permitted to run in fenced areas.

The incident I’ve related here was the worst that I and my dog have experienced, but certainly not the first. My dog, who is always on leash, has been attacked by other off-leash or unrestrained dogs on 3 occasions over the last 10 years, and there have been many close calls. To protect other dogs and people (who can easily get bitten in a dog fight), and to protect your own dog from potentially being classified as vicious and aggressive and perhaps even removed from your care or destroyed, I urge all dog owners to walk their dogs defensively, obeying the leash law. It is there for a good reason: to prevent unnecessary damage, pain, and cost to everyone and their pets.

You Were Expecting Maybe a Coyote?

This peculiar note appeared in a different place than usual: rolled up, tied with a weed, and stuck into the handle of my garbage can. It soon became evident why: this was yet another of our wild correspondents weighing in on what may become a mountain-wide debate, for whom the handle was more accessible than the inside lid, as will become evident. In an effort to represent the views of all our residents, however atypical (and, if I may hazard a judgment, self-important), here follows a faithful rendition of the scratchings found thereon. – Ed.

We crows read with sadness in the June issue of this newsletter that the MPIC has sided with that verminous coyote and helped initiate repressive measures against crowkind! No surprise—crows have always been second-class citizens, and I’ll tell you why: envy! Morons like Mr. Coyote, that shaggy, flea-ridden, earthbound bag of bones and fur, can’t help but resent our glossy black feathers, the power and eloquence of our language, and the fact that we can leave them flat bewildered when we peck their noses and then take to the air. And they can’t stand it that we outnumber them by many dozen to one, just on this mountain alone. Talk of protecting neighborhood character! What, I ask you, is more typical of this neighborhood, this sweet land of Mt. Davidson, than the crow nation who have lived here for generations! Yet one upstart coyote, one celebrity flash in the pan, and everyone forgets our venerable presence, we whose royal blood (in proof whereof I attach my own noble visage) should guarantee we rule this roost forever.

Another thing –we do not wear our black judicial garb for nothing. It is we, after all, who debate and resolve every day above your heads the most critical issues the City faces. If you listened to our judgments, you would have no need for expensive propositions and special elections. No need for bloated bureaucracy. No Sunset ordinance needed for us, no salary, no overtime, no pension—and our counsel is free and open to all. But does anyone pay attention? No –you’d rather suck up to your movie star coyote, whose idea of civic action is to persecute his betters. It is treacherous coyotes who should be banned, fellow citizens, not your faithful friends the crows.

We demand to be judged without a fair trial—and here I must place cawnfidence in own crow language to express the full cawntent of our cawncerted outrage! We cawnclude that we are owed the habeas cawpus stipulated in the cawnstitution of this great cawntry.

We cawndemn and cawl upon the MPIC to reverse its cawardly, cawboy support of that cawpulent, cawpetbagger cawyote immediately, and we cawtion you to mend your cawnduct with respect to the coyote-inspired Crow Control Ordinance, which lacks one cawpuscle of cawmon sense, The cawmplete and only purpose of this cawnfused can of cawn is to populate Mt. Davidson with cawyotes to the ultimate exclusion of all cawled crow. Cawntermand this cawnterproductive cawcawphony of an initiative, this cawldron of cawterized cawpus delicti, and recawpture your cawmunity spirit, or we’ll cawple the fate of your cawporeal cawcasses to that said cawyote—cawt in a trap we crows will set cawfully and not open cawsually. Cawn’t make it any clearer, in all cawtesy, cawn we?

Yours cawnfidentially,
Caldwell C. Concannon
Thane of Cawdor (and King hereafter)

Important Telephone Numbers

by Joanne Whitney

A telephone directory of frequently used telephone numbers appears on page 12 of Miraloma Life. It has been updated and we hope it will be prove useful to you. Of interest is that now all cell phones can access 911. Please also note the Code Enforcement Hotline. If you are faced with a nearby property that is a blight on the neighborhood, you can contact a city agency which has the authority to identify threats to neighborhood health and safety and to devise appropriate solutions to specific situations.

The Code Enforcement Resident Team will coordinate efforts of the Building, Fire, Human Services, Planning, Health and Police Departments. Services offered include community outreach to educate residents and business owners about their rights and responsibilities, response to citizen and City department complaints and ultimately prosecution of violations of city, state and federal codes. So if you have been enduring a particularly irksome problem caused by a neighbor, perhaps this team can offer a solution you had not previously considered